“There is no secret ingredient- it’s just you.” – Kung Fu Panda

Our experiences are different. We have so many shared milestones and nods of “me too”, but the Mummy Wagon ride is so different for everyone. Some seem to bask in the shining warmth radiating through the window pane. They reflect the glow of the sun and absorb the serene landscape that passes by. The hum of the ride is like a soothing pulse which puts them at ease. Sometimes it seems perplexing why the other passengers don’t share the same perspective. It just flows. It just happens… we are the mothers of the earth.

And then there are those… those like me… those who hang on for dear-life, sliding back and forth on the shadowed backseat- holding on- squirming like a drowning worm. Every turn and bump is felt deep within the pit of our stomach. Is it night or day? Sometimes it seems perplexing why the other passengers were given such a different ride….

Regardless of what seat you find yourself on, we’re all on the same journey. How I love the soothing encouragement from humbled masters of motherhood. You’ve got this. Trust yourself. How I love the kindness of the hot-mess mothers. We know… we are here with you. How lucky I’ve been to take the ride with women of encouragement and kindness. This, unfortunately, is not the tale for all…

As we celebrate our first year of parenthood, I inhale the accomplishment of survival, the conquering of new challenges and rest in the overcoming of fear. It has been a year of healing scars, but along with this, a year of cradling fresh wounds. Wounds of motherhood guilt, dread and disappointment. Like I’ve said a million times, it’s not what I had ever imagined the ride to be.

Despite the ups and downs of this ride, as I watch Little One delightfully tucking into his ‘organic, sugar-free’ cake (yeah, I know. I know) and gaze upon the surrounds filled with our greatest advocates- our family and friends- I can’t help but admire this crazy year of change. This once screaming ball of confusion has grown into this little human of humour, determination and gentleness.

Oh, how you have changed me forever. Here is to turning one, Little One. Here’s to us!

Grace embraces our whole story and then… redeems it.